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2018 MCAS
Grade 8 English Language Arts
Question 8

Idea Development - Score Point 5

The essay is fully developed, presenting strong evidence from the passages to produce a convincing account of why both Lincoln and Douglass were effective leaders. The introduction states that they are both "willing to fight for what they believe is right," Douglass by "stand[ing] up for his race" and Lincoln by "always taking information from the American citizens who come to visit and talk to him so he can try to improve the country." The essay goes on to discuss Douglass and Lincoln in turn, skillfully selecting evidence from the passages to explain their leadership qualities. Douglass "believed that because the black soldiers had to do all the same work as the white soldiers that they should have equal pay, equal opportunities . . . and equal protection." In meeting with Lincoln, Douglass "was able to stand up for what he believed was right and eventually he received the results that he had been looking for." For his part, Lincoln "was a very effective leader because he did not make all the changes to the country based on what he thought was right, but he made them because that's what the people had told him that they wanted." The conclusion, though relatively brief, insightfully synthesizes the leadership qualities of the two men by explaining that they both "had the drive and the passion" to do what they believed in and were both "able to accomplish many things because they were not fearful of what others would think of their choices." Rich expression of ideas and skillful organization of developed details contribute to the overall meaning and reveal full awareness of the writing task.

Standard English Conventions - Score Point 3

The essay includes a variety of sentence structures in complex text. Sentence formation is mostly correct and controlled, as are grammar, usage, and mechanics. Quotations are well integrated into the text; for example, "Eventually he had so many people lining up to share information with him that 'the crowds became unmanageable,' and he had to enforce visiting hours." Despite some obvious errors, overall correctness supports clear expression of ideas.
Answer for Idea Development Score Point 5, and Standard English Conventions Score Point 3 In both "Waiting for Mr. Lincoln" by Russell Freedman and Life and Times of Frederick Douglass by Frederick Douglass it is clear that Abraham Lincoln and Frederick Douglass are both extremely good at what they do. Also they are willing to fight for what they believe is right. Because of these two outstanding qualities they are each very successful and effective leaders in their own ways. Douglass stands up for his race and tries to get Lincoln to change the way that the African American community is treated, and Lincoln is always taking information from the American citizens who come to visit and talk to him so he can try to improve the country and make it a better place. Frederick Douglass may have been one of the few great African American leaders that actually fought for what he believed was right. And because of this his actions became very effective. Douglass "Walked in the White House on the morning of August 10, 1863" and he was willing to wait as long as he had to so that he could meet with the president (Freedman, 1). He wanted to discuss some problems that he had seen arising since African American men had begun to be drafted into the US Army to help fight off the southern states. He believed that because the black soldiers had to do all the same work as the white soldiers that they should have equal pay, equal opportunities to advance in positions that they had earned, and equal protection while serving. While Douglass may not have been one hundred percent successful at improving the rights he sure did get his point across to President Lincoln. And it helped that President Lincoln had seen Frederick as an effective leader from the second he heard his name called. This was only because he had heard it before, he even said to Douglass "Mr. Seward has told me all about you" and this helped to make Douglass feel as though he was talking to someone that respected him and would give him truthful answers (Douglass, 1). Douglass told Lincoln what he thought and Lincoln seemed concerned about all that was occurring and gave Douglass answers that he may not have agreed with at the time but in the end it turned out for the better because eventually the African American troupes were treated the same as the other American soldiers and slavery was ended. So all in all Douglass was an extremely effective leader because he did not care what people thought of him, and because of this he as able to stand up for what he believed was right and eventually he received the results that he had been looking for. Abraham Lincoln tried to do as much as he could for the people of the United States. He even helped to end slavery. But where did he get all of this information about what was happening in the country in all the places that he wasn't some may ask. Well that's where the quality of being an effective leader came in handy for the President. He constantly "Tried to meet with as many callers as he possibly could each day" and he would use the advice that some of the citizens gave him to help improve the country in ways that he saw fit (Freedman, 3). Eventually he had so many people lining up to share information with him that "The crowds became unmanageable," and he had to enforce visiting hours because it was all just to much to handle (Freedman, 4). But that didnt stop him form using his citizens advice to improve the country, he still took it all into consideration. Due to the fact that Lincoln did all of this it allowed him to become an effective leader. So in the end Lincoln was a very effective leader because he did not make all the changes to the country based on what he thought was right, but he made them because that's what the people had told him that they wanted, and this was a better way to keep the citizens happy, calm, and at peace with eachother. After reading "Waiting for Mr. Lincoln" by Russell Freedman and Life and Times of Frederick Douglass by Frederick Doublass it is clear that both Frederick Douglass and Abraham Lincoln were very good at their professional jobs. They were both able to fight for and do what they believed was right. And because they had the drive and the passion to do this they became very effective leaders. As effective leaders they were able to accomplish many things because they were not fearful of what others would think of their choices.



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