2019 MCAS
Grade 10 English Language Arts
Question 9
Idea Development - Score Point 5
Though the organization of ideas is somewhat formulaic in this essay, the writing is fully developed with purposeful selection and explanation of evidence from the three passages. The introduction includes a clear thesis that is then developed for each passage: "sensory details are used to create feelings of uneasiness in the reader," and all passages "create a spooky mood by describing the narrators' environments and portraying their feelings of loneliness." Personification and imagery are cited in the text of Dracula, and the author's intent is explained: "By portraying [the trees] with human-like emotions, the reader gets a sense that the narrator is nervous," and the "'strange optical effect'" causes the mood to become "very unsettling," creating "a sense of loneliness in the narrator." Descriptive details heighten tension, especially in the appearance of "vic[i]ous wolves." As a result, the narrator "does not know how to handle [his] uneasy emotions." Personification is noted in Rebecca as well, where strange trees grow—with disruptive purpose—in once familiar surroundings, creating a mood of uneasiness and a loss of familiarity that seems "supernatural." The word choice of the author of the passage is analyzed as it pertains to the mood of uneasiness. Similarly, the mood established in Station Eleven is grim. The forest is personified as it intentionally moves to consume once familiar places. The writer further describes feelings of "uneasiness" at the sight of "old ashes mixed with animal bones"—an image so stark that it affects both the narrator and reader. The "desperate needs" of the characters are mentioned to highlight how alone they are in this world. Overall, ideas are rich with carefully chosen details, and the writer demonstrates full awareness of the writing task and mode.
Standard English Conventions - Score Point 3
The writer uses a variety of sentence forms to craft a coherent analysis of the passages. Sentence structures are correct, and ideas flow easily between sentences and paragraphs. The response includes some awkward sentences (e.g., "Throughout Rebecca, there are feelings of supernatural surroundings in which the narrator finds herself which creates an unsettling mood to the passage"); however, these do not detract from the quality of consistent control. Advanced vocabulary, such as "enhance" and "deepens the perception," also outweighs minor errors in spelling and usage. Consistent control of grammar, usage, and mechanics supports clear meaning.
![Answer for Idea Development Score Point 5, and Standard English Conventions Score Point 3
Though the organization of ideas is somewhat formulaic in this essay, the writing is fully developed with purposeful selection and explanation of evidence from the three passages. The introduction includes a clear thesis that is then developed for each passage: "sensory details are used to create feelings of uneasiness in the reader," and all passages "create a spooky mood by describing the narrators' environments and portraying their feelings of loneliness." Personification and imagery are cited in the text of <i>Dracula</i>, and the author's intent is explained: "By portraying [the trees] with human-like emotions, the reader gets a sense that the narrator is nervous," and the "'strange optical effect'" causes the mood to become "very unsettling," creating "a sense of loneliness in the narrator." Descriptive details heighten tension, especially in the appearance of "vic[i]ous wolves." As a result, the narrator "does not know how to handle [his] uneasy emotions." Personification is noted in <i>Rebecca</i> as well, where strange trees grow—with disruptive purpose—in once familiar surroundings, creating a mood of uneasiness and a loss of familiarity that seems "supernatural." The word choice of the author of the passage is analyzed as it pertains to the mood of uneasiness. Similarly, the mood established in <i>Station Eleven</i> is grim. The forest is personified as it intentionally moves to consume once familiar places. The writer further describes feelings of "uneasiness" at the sight of "old ashes mixed with animal bones"—an image so stark that it affects both the narrator and reader. The "desperate needs" of the characters are mentioned to highlight how alone they are in this world. Overall, ideas are rich with carefully chosen details, and the writer demonstrates full awareness of the writing task and mode.](/mcas/student/2019/19r10e09-5b.gif)
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