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2018 MCAS
Grade 6 English Language Arts
Question 24

Idea Development - Score Point 5

The essay fully develops the central idea of how Rinko in A Jar of Dreams and the speaker in Somewhere Among feel about their heritage. Relevant selection of evidence is used to support the argument that the narrator in the passage and the speaker in the poem both feel "trapped between their two cultures, [unaccepted] by others, and unproud of their different heritages." The organization of relevant and specific details is skilled, using evidence from the passage and the poem. Details from the passage and the poem are integrated into each of the three main points, contributing to the overall cohesiveness of the essay. The first body paragraph, for example, explains how the narrators [the narrator and the speaker] feel stuck between two cultures and cannot see themselves as either Japanese or American: "Rinko tries on her kimono. When she looks at herself, she sees a young, Japanese girl and says, 'That's not me.'" In the poem, the speaker sees herself as "'between two cultures, two languages, two time zones, every day.'" The essay emphasizes Rinko's and the speaker's similar feelings about their heritage through careful development of details and a rich expression of ideas, demonstrating a full awareness of the task and mode.

Standard English Conventions - Score Point 3

The essay demonstrates consistent control of Standard English conventions over complex and varied sentences. For example, "Rinko is fearful that others will respond negatively to her cultural customs, so when her family was requested to come to school she prevented them from going because, 'I didn't want her bowing to all my teachers and talking to them in the funny English she sometimes uses.'" Notably, proper punctuation of text-based evidence is consistent throughout, and the few minor errors do not detract from meaning.
Answer for Idea Development Score Point 5, and Standard English Conventions Score Point 3 In the passage, "A Jar of Dreams" by Yoshiko Uchida and the poem "Somewhere Among" by Annie Donwerth-Chikamatsu, the speaker feels trapped between their two cultures, unexcepted by others, and unproud of their different heritages. In both excerpts, the narrator feels stuck between two cultures, unexcepting of themselves. In the passage from "A Jar of Dreams", Rinko tries on her kimono. When she looks at herself, she sees a young, Japenese girl and says, "'That's not me.'"(7) She cannot see herself as a Japenese girl, even if her Japenese family can see her that way. Because she was born in America, she can't seem to fit in with Japanese or American culture. She cannot accept who she is as a person, and feels stuck, halfway through, and can't place herself as a Japanese girl, even when she looks like one. In the poem, "Somewhere Among", the reader also feels stuck between her two heritages. The narrator of the passage sees themselves as,"I am between two cultures, two languages, two time zones, every day." (23-28) She also says,"Everywhere I go, here or their I am different."(29-31) The narrrator cannot see themselves as either Japanese or American. Whether they are in Japan or America, they never feel at home, in place.They are always between the two cultures, and everthing that goes along with them. They feel that every day they don't feel like part of one thing, but split between two heritages. In both passages the characters cannot seem to fit in with one side of their family or another, but are stuck, half and half, between each of their cultures. Another feeling both passges supported was that the narrator feels left out and unexcepted by others because of their heritage. When Rinko's grandmother is talking to her about her heritage they say, "'But don't ever forget, a part of you will always be Japanese too, even if you never wear a kimono again.''I know,' I said 'It's the part that makes me feel different and not as good as the others.'"(29/30) She also remarks,"'I hate always being different and left out."(33) Rinko feels she is not as valuable or important as others because of her heritage. She feels she is so different from others and will always be left out due to her family's history. In the poem, the narrator says,"Not like anyone else, here or there I sometimes feel alone on an island surrounded by multitude of people."(37-42) This quote supports the idea that the narrator sometimes feels as if she is alone in the world, with eveyone else surrounding her. Yet she does not seem to fit in anywhere in the ocean of society. She is different from others, and does not belong in one group or the other, so she feels unexcepted in her position. In both passages, the narrator feels as if their split heritage is preventing them from fitting into society. Finally, the narrators in both passages feel unproud of their and their families' differences. Rinko is fearful that others will respond negatively to her cultural customs, so when her family was requested to come to school she prevented them from going because, "I didn't want her bowing to all my teachers and talking to them in the funny English she sometimes uses. I didn't want Mama to be ignored by everybody and left sitting in a corner. I guess maybe I was a little bit ashamed of Mama. But mostly I was ashamed of myself."(32) Rinko feels that her family's customs will be strange enough for others to not except her. She cannot see past the fact that is is different to others to see that she should be proud of who she is, who her family is. She is not proud of her heritage, even though being unique is a positive thing. She prevents others from attending activities because she is embarassed of her heritage and culture. In the poem, the narrator also feels unproud of her different heritages. She says, "Somtimes I'd rather be on the moon surrounded by multitudes of stars."(43-45) The narrator feels that she would rather be alone, unable to express her differences, then have to be herself in society. She is unproud of her value and heritage, and wished she could be alone to be herself instead of having to face up to others. She doesn't want to be herself if she has to do it with others. In both excerpts, the main character has trouble being proud of who they are, and wish to instead be sho they are wothout others around them. In conclusion, the narrators of both the passage "A Jar of Dreams" and the poem "Somewhere Among" express the feelings toward their cultures. Both narrators feel trapped between two cultures, unexcepted by others, and unproud of their heritage. But by the end of both stories, the characters learn that they are who they are, and can accomplich great things, no matter where they come from.



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